** FOR BOTH OF YOU**
10 to 12 months prior to your wedding…
- Plan the type of wedding you both want to have: religious/civil/single/double ring
- Decide on the degree of formality and size of wedding.
- Set a wedding date, and have at least one other possibility to fall back upon.
- Discuss your wedding budget fully with each other.
- Compile your guest list together, with family input.
- Arrange for your Church ceremony and wedding rehearsal (consult clergy person).
- Engage the organist/musicians and soloist immediately.
- Acquire a suitable reception location (enquire re: change room, kitchen, facilities,bartender, liquor license etc.)
- If need be, book the services of a caterer.
- Hire the reception entertainment.
- Select your bridal party – use one usher for every 50 guests as a guide here.
NOTE: Contrary to common belief, it is not necessary to have the same number of ushers and bridesmaids.
** FOR THE LADIES**
- The bride begins to shop for her wedding gown. She should visit all the shops possible and choose to deal with the one where she received the nicest service and best selection. Although the bride accepts the opinions of her mother and/or maid of honor in making her choice, it is still her decision alone as it is HER wedding day.
*The bride’s personal attire includes () wedding dress ()veil and headpiece () shoes () bride’s garter () lingerie () going away outfit and accessories.
- The bridesmaids may now choose their dresses so as to compliment the wedding gown.
NOTE: The flower girl usually wears a replica of the bridemaid’s dresses or a fancy white party dress with a belt or bow of a color that matches the bridemaids’ dresses.
4 to 6 months prior to your wedding…
Order your stationery supplies, which may include:
- invitations *- wedding scrolls for guests’ cake
-announcements *- confetti/ rice or rice bags
- “thank you” notes *- sketch maps – to church
- guest book – to reception hall
- gift record book *-matches
- serviettes *- place cards
* (Optional)
- Decide on your reception menu and notify the caterer of your choice.
- Visit the jeweler for groom’s ring (if double ring ceremony).
- Choose and register your patterns for : ______ fine china
______ every day china
______ crystal
______ silver
- Order your wedding cake – use color swatches so that everything matches. Cakes may even be decorated with replicas of flowers found in your bouquet.
- Arrange for the groom’s cake at the same time , if required.
3 to 4 months prior to your wedding…
- Together with the intended groom, choose gifts for your attendants. Remember that engraving may take a number of weeks to get done.
- Complete your invitation and announcement lists.
- Pick up your invitations and other stationery supplies that you ordered.
NOTE: The flower girl’s memento is usually her basket of silk flowers. The ring bearer gets to keep the ring pillow. A nice touch is to have your first names and the date of your wedding embroidered on the pillow.
INVITATIONS
Proper etiquette dictates that invitations be sent out to all our relatives, guests and members of the wedding party. Two envelopes enclose the invitation and often a small self-addressed stamped enveloped containing R.S.V.P. (reply if your please ) card is enclosed.
Remember to include on your list the clergy person ( and spouse), Church musicians and photographer.
NOTE: All guests over 18 years of age should receive their own separate invitation. Invitations sent out of the country require that country’s return postage.
Since weddings are really family affairs, approach other members of your two families as the addressing of envelopes may take two or three weeks to complete. Your maid of honor may also offer her assistance here. Postal and Zip code books are available through your local post office or library.
Invitations should be mailed out at least 6 to 8 weeks before the wedding. This will allow for possible delivery delays. Reply cards are to be returned to the bride’s mother , who then checks them off as they come in. The reply cards should be dated at least three weeks ahead of the wedding date.
NOTE: If children are to be included at the reception, add their names or the phrase “and family” to the invitation.
- Send a wedding announcement to the local paper’s social editor. Announcements are usually sent to relatives and friends who were not invited to the wedding or who were unable to attend the wedding.
- Choose music for organist and soloist after consulting with your clergy person.
- Notify organist and soloist of your final choices.
2 to 3 months prior to your wedding…
- Arrange to have a display area if your gifts are to be displayed.
- Book the hairdresser appointments for bride, bridesmaids, mother and flower girl.
- See your beautician or make-up consultant . Use your color swatches to ensure that make up and nail colors used match the colors of the dresses and flowers.
- Together with your groom to be, select suitable accommodations for after the honeymoon.
- Make arrangements for any necessary furniture and appliances.
1 to 2 months prior to your wedding…
Check and reconfirm _____ reception entertainment
_____ reception menu
_____ photographer/video arrangements
_____ florist orders
_____ wedding cake status
_____ hair dresser appointments
- Complete trousseau.
- The bride, bridesmaids and mothers go for their fittings during the last month.
- Begin to record or acknowledge each gift as it arrives. The “thank you” cards are mailed out after the honeymoon.
- Make up a seating outline for the bridal party, parents, grandparents,clergy and other special guests attending the reception.
- Plan a bridesmaids’ luncheon or a rehearsal party. A barbeque, a picnic, a potluck dinner, a buffet supper at home, a restaurant meal or even a poolside party are all acceptable and any one may be used here.
NOTE: – if not provided through the Church, the bride and the groom must obtain their own marriage license – birth certificate will be needed. If previously needed, bring the divorce decree. If under age, parental content may be necessary.
- some locations require blood tests and physical examinations as prerequisites before a marriage license can be issued.
2 to 3 weeks prior to your wedding…
- Begin packing for honeymoon.
- Arrange to have someone record late gift arrivals.
- Verify the arrangements for picking up or delivery of flowers and cake.
- Check on commitments made with the organists or soloist.
- Confirm time of wedding rehersal and inform all participants.
- Notify the caterers of the final guest count.
- Get inoculations for the honeymoon. (if needed)
- Pick up passports. (if needed)
- Maid of honor and bridesmaids plan hall decorations.
- Draw up a possible seating plan for your reception guests.
- Make up place cards for the head table and the parent’s table.
During last week…
- The bride remembers her rehearsal party gifts for the groom and all female attendants.
- Pick up wedding cake if it is not to be delivered, as well as any rented items.
- Have your belongings moved to your new home.
- Give a bridemaids’ luncheon.
- Hair appointments are kept.
- Complete your honeymoon packing.
- Pick up all dresses at least 2 or 3 days prior to the wedding.
- The maid of honor and bridesmaids arrange to decorate the location of the reception as close to the wedding day as possible.
NOTE: Remember to arrange to have your honeymoon suitcases and going away outfit at the location where you plan to go and change on the wedding day.
* FOR THE GROOM AND MALE ATTENDANTS*
10 to 12 months prior to your wedding…
A good idea is to first read over the Preparation Guide with your intended bride. Then as soon as possible , do the following together.
- Plan type of wedding.
- Set date.
- Discuss and set a wedding budget.
- Make out guest list.
- Acquire organist.
- Pick a reception location.
- Book reception entertainment.
- Select wedding party.
8 to 12 months prior to your wedding…
(With your bride to be)
- Discuss honeymoon possibilities.
- Set a honeymoon budget.
- Book honeymoon trip.
- Arrange for passports (if needed).
- Inquire as to any needed inoculations.
4 to 8 months prior to your wedding…
- Select wedding ring with the bride. Ring should be engraved with date and initials of both the bride and the groom.
- Offer to assist in any way.
- Possibly to help to acquire photographer or video personnel.
- Give input re: reception menu.
- Purchase gifts for the male attendants.
- Give input for music at Church.
- Buy wedding gift for your bride.
3 to 4 months prior to your wedding day…
- Offer to help address invitations.
- Together select accommodation for after honeymoon and arrange for any necessary furniture or appliances needed for your new residence.
- Choose your tuxedo and related apparel.
- The male attendants should come in as soon as possible, preferably with in the next two weeks, and order their wedding attire from the groom’s same Men’s formal shop.
- The ring bearer may be included here or many wear any other appropriate attire.
- The best man chooses the proper attire in order to complement what the groom has chosen.
NOTE: Ensure that colors chosen do not clash with bridal attendants’ attire or the dresses the mothers will be wearing.
1 to 2 months prior to your wedding day…
(With your bride to be)
- Acquire the marriage license – these papers will be needed: birth certificates, driver’s licenses, and proof of citizenship.
- Pick up tickets and confirmations of honeymoon travel arrangements.
- Notify all wedding rehearsal participants of the time, place and date of rehearsal party.
- Assist the bride-to-be in the seating arrangements for the reception.
- The best man should take the lead in the planning of a rehearsal party.
2 to 3 weeks prior to your wedding…
- Groom plans transportation for bridal party.
- Begin your honeymoon party.
- Groom arranges suitable accommodation for out-of-town guests. Try for a hotel group rate and send out confirmation cards. Guests usually pay for their own room.
- Acquire inoculations (if needed).
- Get blood test (if needed).
- Best man and ushers plan appropriate car decorations.
During last week…
- Groom remembers the wedding rehearsal gifts for his bride and male attendants.
- Groom arranges remuneration for organist and instrumentalists, etc.
- Financial arrangements for honeymoon are dealt with.
- The men pick up all rented formal wear.
- Groom completes his honeymoon packing.
- Have your personal belongings move to your new home.
- The male attendants decorate wedding party vehicles as close to the time of the wedding as possible.
NOTE: Remember to arrange to have your honeymoon suitcases and going away outfit at the location where you plan to go and change on the wedding day.
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